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step 1 Wear: Hi, Napoleon. What do you would history june once again?Napoleon Dynamite: I told you! We invested they using my buddy from inside the Alaska google search wolverines!Don: Do you take one?Napoleon Dynamite: Yes, such as fifty out of ‘em! It remaining seeking attack my cousins, what the deuce do you really create in a situation this way?Don: What kind of firearm do you explore?Napoleon Dynamite: A good freakin’ a dozen-evaluate, precisely what do do you think?
2 Napoleon Dynamite: [Giving the latest llama scoops off casserole across the fence] Tina, your body weight lard, started get some Eating!… Tina, consume. Restaurants. Eat your food!
step three Professor: Your existing experiences, Napoleon.Napoleon Dynamite: The other day, Japanese experts explaced… place explosive detonators in the bottom of Lake Loch Ness to help you blow Nessie outside of the drinking water. Sir Cort Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance summoned the assistance of Scotland’s local wizards so you’re able to shed a defensive enchantment along side river and its local citizens and all those who search for this new quiet lifetime of our own underwater friend.
5 Deb: Preciselywhat are you attracting?Napoleon Dynamite: Good liger.Deb: What’s a liger?Napoleon Dynamite: It’s pretty much my personal favorite animal. It is instance a great lion and you may an effective tiger combined… bred for the feel from inside the wonders.
6 Napoleon Dynamite: [speaing frankly about Deb’s milk] I find you happen to be taking 1%. Would be the fact ‘cause you think you are lbs? ‘End in you are not. You may be consuming whole if you wanted to.
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8 Bro Rico: How about your girlfriend?Kip: Well, everything is providing quite big immediately. I am talking about, i talk on the web to possess, such as for example, two hours everyday and so i assume you could potentially state something is gettin’ very really serious.
nine Napoleon Dynamite: Perform some birds enjoys large talons?Farmer: Manage he has got just what?Napoleon Dynamite: Highest talons.Farmer: I do not understand a word you just told you.
10 [Napoleon has actually snuck tator tots outside of the dinner room and is actually eating her or him throughout class out-of their jeans pocket] Randy: Napoleon, promote myself a few of your own tots.Napoleon Dynamite: No, go come across your.Randy: Get real, render myself several of the tots.Napoleon Dynamite: Zero, I am freakin’ starving! I didn’t reach eat *anything* today.Randy: [Kicks the latest pocket for the tots, crushing them] Napoleon Dynamite: Ugh! Disgusting! Freakin’ idiot!
11 Napoleon Dynamite: Stay at home and eat all the latest freakin’ potato chips, Kip.Kip: Napoleon, don’t let yourself be envious that I have already been chatting on line with ladies… *non-stop*. Besides, both of us know that I’m degree are a cage fighter.Napoleon Dynamite: Because when, Kip? There is the terrible reflexes of all time.Kip: Try to struck me personally, Napoleon.Napoleon Dynamite: Exactly what?Kip: We told you go lower here and find out what goes on for people who strive to hit me.
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fourteen [earliest lines] Guy into Bus: Preciselywhat are you planning to would today, Napoleon?Napoleon Dynamite: Whatever I’m such as for example I need to would. Gosh!
15 Brother Rico: Kip, I reckon… you understand a lot from the… websites? You ever discover one thing… instance date travel?Kip: Easy, I’ve already looked at they to have me.Buddy Rico: Close to… directly on.
sixteen Napoleon Dynamite: What kind of bicycle have you got?Pedro: It is an effective sledgehammer.Napoleon Dynamite: Dang! You’ve got unexpected situations, pegs… lucky! Your ever before eliminate it people nice jumps?Napoleon Dynamite: [Move Pedro moving] You’ve got for example around three base out-of air the period.
19 Napoleon Dynamite: [while hitch-hiking] So are all of you like Pedro’s cousins using nice hookups?Cholo No. 1: Simon![North american country slang having “Hell, yeah!”]
20 Buddy Rico: How much cash you should make a wager I could toss a sporting events more than them hills?… Yeah… Advisor woulda set me for the fourth quarter, i would’ve become state champions. Definitely. Without doubt during my mind.
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21 Kip: Thus when’s grandma going back?Bro Rico: I’m not sure. Undecided.Napoleon Dynamite: You don’t need to stand right here around, we’re not kids.Bro Rico: Ha ha! Speak to your Auntie Carolyn.Napoleon Dynamite: Kip is like 32 yrs old.Kip: I do not brain if you remain.
twenty-two Randy: Hey, render me personally fifty dollars and so i can acquire a pop.Bullied Child: I don’t have one, Randy.Randy: C’mon, I shall pay your straight back.Bullied Guy: There isn’t…[Randy grabs him because of the straight back of neck and initiate taking along on it] Randy: I am going to do that for your requirements…Bullied Boy: Usually do not! Avoid! Prevent! You should never! Ow. Right here, here.[Randy holds the money and you will walks out] Napoleon Dynamite: [Napoleon, who has got come seeing, walks to the little one] How’s their neck?Bullied Son: Stings.Napoleon Dynamite: That’s also crappy.[Napoleon also offers your good boondoggle trick-chain] Napoleon Dynamite: Pedro gives you his defense.[Move next scene – the new bullied kid are bringing his bike away from a shelf and you may Randy walks right up] Randy: Hello, i’d like to borrow your bike.Bullied Guy: No.Randy: C’mon, I am going to make you specific potato chips.Bullied Child: No![They continue to battle over the bike] Cholo No. 1, Cholo #2: [push right up within their reasonable-rider convertible, having “Vote cuatro Pedro” painted to your doorway. The fresh rider shakes their direct ‘no’ with an intimidating lookup into the their deal with. Randy provides up-and walks out of the man. The newest bullied son grins]
23 Kip: LaFawnduh are *the* smartest thing who may have ever happened to me. I’m one hundred% confident she is my soul mate. Don’t be concerned Napoleon, I am aware there’s a babe on the market to you personally too. Comfort away.
Do you wish to stop delivering trapped about pal region?
twenty-five [Kip are vocal to Lafawnduh once they are obvious spouse and wife] Kip: Why do you love me? So why do you need me? Usually and forever… We fulfilled within the a chatroom, today our love is fully grow… Yes cyberspace is great, but you, you create my salivate… I adore technology, but not to your, the thing is that… However, I Still love tech… Usually and forever. All of our like feels as though a head off doves, flying as much as paradise over… always and you can permanently, usually and you can forever… Exactly why do you want myself? So why do you love myself? Constantly and permanently…
twenty-six Kip: [Napoleon has Kip in a great sleeper-hold] Ow! Ah geez!Napoleon Dynamite: Exactly what the crap is Cousin Rico doin’ at my girlfriend’s home?Kip: Napoleon, release me! In my opinion you will be bruisin’ my personal neck meat!Napoleon Dynamite: Okay![Napoleon launches Kip] Napoleon Dynamite: What the deuce are you currently men doin’? Tryin’ to help you ruin living and then make me appear to be an excellent freakin’ idiot?Kip: I am aside makin’ some nice moola having Sibling Rico. Geez, I believe your ripped my mole off.Napoleon Dynamite: I did?Kip: Yeah, would it be bleeding?Napoleon Dynamite: A little bit.
27 Pedro: Do you consider people will vote for my situation?Napoleon Dynamite: Hell yes! I would vote to you.Pedro: Such as preciselywhat are my personal knowledge?Napoleon Dynamite: Better, you have a sweet bike. And you are good at linking which have girls. In addition to you might be such as the only boy in school who has got a beneficial mustache.